CHOOSING A THERAPIST
It can be daunting, finding the right person to help you through a particular challenge you're facing—and just at the time when you may be feeling the most confused or the least trusting! Remember that it's US who are on the job interview, not you. This is a relationship where training and skill are essential, but trust is arguably most important. You aren't buying a toaster. You're doing something very hard, very brave: looking for a place to speak openly about how you're feeling, what you're thinking—a place where you might be sharing secrets you've never told a living soul. This is not the time to blindly trust the first person who comes along simply because they look the part (smokes a pipe, nods head at right moment, letters after name).
In the Yellow Pages under "Counseling" or "Psychologist," you'll see lots of names with letters clustered around them (and some without letters: you actually don't need a license to call yourself a "psychotherapist" and a license or degree doesn't guarantee that you'll be a good therapist either—only that you've been properly trained - which is important... confused yet?). If they are "Dr." So-And-So, this means they've completed their "doctorate" in graduate school (the highest academic degree) in some field of study, presumably Psychology. But it could be in nuclear physics or poetry and warrant that "Dr." before their name. Check it out. Other letters after names include: LCSW, or "Licensed Clinical Social Worker:" a Master's level (2-3 years of Grad school) license in "Social Work," a discipline with its focus on community mental health; LCPC, or "Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor:" another Master's level license with a focus on "clinical" work (a vague distinction); "Ph.D.," ("Doctor of Philosophy" - an ancient label) another way of saying "Dr." And there are MFT's, "Marriage & Family Therapists" and a few other variations.
Just as in other professions, true talent, know-how, artistry, and "bed-side manner" are difficult to train into folks. We've all met brilliant doctors with no ability to connect with people. You're probably looking for someone who is: warm but not runny; smart but not brainy; strong but approachable; with a sense of humor but not a jokester... someone just right—right for YOU. You'll want to get to know them a bit, give it a little time—two or three sessions, say. You might want to interview them with prepared questions about everything from their training to their favorite movie to why they chose this line of work. Check your gut often and trust it. Think about whether the clinician's gender identity is an issue. Finally, you want a "good-enough" therapist (not a perfect one)... a caring, trustworthy, but real human being to give you their undivided attention. The good news is there's some great ones out there—just stay sharp. TB
